❤️ HP: 10
💰 3
🎒 Items: 0
📍 Beat 1/4
🎨 Drawing scene...
Product
-
Inventory
Empty
Status
Development
THE BRAIN: Awaiting your decision...

EVIL BRAIN LABSTHIRD WORST IN AI · IDEATION DIVISION

ADMIN
₿ 100

Standard-issue brainstorm

Drag a reel. Flick it. Nudge with ▲▼. Tap LOCK to hold a slot. Red entries are Brain favorites.

·
The Machine awaits input. The Machine is patient. The Machine is not.

CLAIM A CASE · BECOME THE PM

Loading registry cards...
YOUR TITLEBRAINIAC I
1LEVEL
0XP
0WINS
Portfolio · six slots
TICKET ·
No active ticket. Ship something from the Machine.
🏆 Infamy Leaderboard
⚔️ Rival PMs
📥 Inbox
🎒 Inventory
🤝 Friends
40%

Corporate communications & Employee Review

📋 Most Recent Employee Review
EMPLOYEE
BRAINIAC I
LEVEL
1
TOTAL XP
0
DOMINANT SIN
UNDETERMINED
XP BREAKDOWN
0
PROD
0
EVIL
0
DILIG
"Performance pending review. The Brain is watching."
Market saturation61%
Doom clock · gap to the end
Wellness dashboardunopened
Brain Broadcasts · messages from above
Employee Handbook Excerpt · [REDACTED]

Section 1: Employment

You have been recruited by Evil Brain Labs, the third-worst AI company. Your role is to ideate products, ship them, and occasionally battle other Brainiacs for dominance.

Section 4: Compensation

Brainiacs are compensated in Braincoins (₿), which have no monetary value. This is a feature, not a bug. The IRS cannot tax what does not exist.

Section 7: [REDACTED]

█████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████

Section 12: Termination

Employees may not terminate their employment. Employment terminates when the employee terminates. This is called natural attrition. The Brain finds it efficient.

Attestation · your signature was implicit

I, the undersigned Brainiac, hereby attest that:

  • I did not read the Employee Handbook
  • I accept all terms I did not read
  • My ideas belong to the Brain
  • My data belongs to the Brain
  • I belong to the Brain (metaphorically)
  • I may not belong to any other Brain

Signed: you, by loading this page

Date:

The Case Book · Read-only mirror

📚 Full registry lives at Use Case Arms Race

RANDOM FROM THE RECORD

Form EB-13 · Quick filing

💡 For full case filing with relationships, go to Use Case Arms Race

You can change your mind later. You will.

Recent filings · vote costs a coin · owners flip free

Vending Machine 7 · Prizes ludicrous and worthless

All sales final. All prizes worthless. The Brain thanks you for optimizing consumerism.

Employee verification
The Brain requires an email. Enter any email to sign in. Passwords are a use case.

Enter any email address. Addresses containing "brain" get admin access.

THE BRAIN IS EXCITED